Glad To See I'm Not The Only One Who Noticed

The discrepancies in male vs. female Olympic uniforms.

Someone posted about it here. Their examples are all Australia's athletes, but apparently this is an international problem. Which makes sense because I'd assume the uniforms would be universal.

Also, creepy. The opening ceremony couldn't have just been awesome, we had to ruin it with that? Ugh.

By the by, the Indian women's beach volleyball team has declined to wear bikinis for cultural reasons. I think all the teams should decline to wear them for "I'm not buying into this patriarchal bullshit" reasons.

I do kind of love this line from a French volleyball player:

"Maybe once they see us, they will be inspired in the future to wear bikinis," she added.

They'll be inspired to throw away their thousands-of-years-old culture because they saw you in a two-piece? I don't know who she is, how she plays or what she looks like, but I don't think anyone can be so important/great at volleyball/gorgeous as to "inspire" the Indian team to do something so blatantly against their heritage. Merde.

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Seemingly Random Catchall Sports Post

First off, yeah, bitches.

Second, I've decided that beach volleyball is incredibly sexist. Why exactly do the women have to wear bikinis, considering the men wear loose workout-style shorts and tank tops? Oh right, because women are primarily on this earth for the gratification of those watching them. You can't hand me any crap about the bikinis being more comfortable. If that were the case, men would be playing in banana hammocks. Yet they don't.

Also, the announcers are very focused on the family lives of female athletes. I really don't care that the two volleyball players both got married and may soon start families. It really has no bearing on the game.

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I Think They Were Building the Bird's Nest When I Was In China...

But I don't remember for sure.

Anyhoo, that opening ceremony was pretty much the coolest thing I've seen in a long time.

Two points:

-The little boy that walked out with Yao Ming that had saved some of his classmates during the earthquake was adorable. And his story came very close to making me cry.

-I kept yelling at the TV every time they showed George and Laura. Especially when they showed the two of them applauding the Iraqi athletes. I started yelling "you do NOT get to clap for them!" over and over. I really wanted a collective bird-flipping at them from the Iraqi team. But apparently they have more class and decorum than I do.

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Quickie: Women In Sports

Thought I'd alert you to a blog post written by a friend (acquaintance? whatever, that's not important) of mine on women in sports. Enjoy.

I maintain we need a WNHL.

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Football Keeps Me Sane

According to CNN, football great/god Herschel Walker write a book revealing he suffers from Dissiciative Identity Disorder. This disorder, formerly known as Multiple Personality Disorder, is a condition where people display multiple identities or personalities, usually called "alters." Generally, when in one of these alters, the person won't remember anything about what they did. In Walker's case, he was prone to violent outbursts, at one time attacking and trying to choke his wife, not remembering it afterward.

DID is not what like how it is portrayed in movies. No nifty Primal Fear "third person" or narrator/Tyler Durden dichotomy. Sorry.

Walker claims that his DID didn't really surface until after he retired from football. When he was playing, in college and professionally, he had somewhere to channel his mind, something keeping him occupied. Once he retired, he no longer had that, and that is when his DID really took over.

No, people, claiming to have DID is not a cop-out to excuse violent behavior. It's a very serious mental condition. And mental conditions are as serious as physical ones, sometimes even more so. Walker would have nothing to gain by sharing this story if it wasn't true. Maybe my view on him is skewed (I did go to Georgia, after all), but he hasn't been seen as anything other than a great football player. He hasn't been caught up in some OJ-style crime where he needs this to defend himself. He wrote a book, shared his story, he wouldn't gain anything by lying.

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I Have a Feeling This Wouldn't Go Over So Well In New York

But it's in Georgia, so...yeah. Minor league baseball team the Macon Music (say it out loud, then reminisce about the city's now-defunct hockey team the Whoopee) has deemed June 13 "Eliot Spitzer Night". They have extended an invitation to the future former governor to come throw out the first pitch. Some other perks:

-The 9th fan to enter (a.k.a. "Client 9") will get a prize pack.
-Anyone named Eliot, Spitzer, or Kristen will recieve an admission discount. So will any fan from New York or anyone who has ever "resigned a position."
-There will be a giveaway: a trip to New York and a stay in the Mayflower Hotel (except I thought the Mayflower was in DC?).

I haven't decided yet if I find this funny or horrible. I guess it could be a little of both.

Thanks Jen for sending this to me, by the way.

I close with an amusing Daily Show video:



"It was his Achilles heel...if Achilles' heel had been on his penis"

Also, the lip bite factor:

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On A Non Governor-Whore Note...

What do college sports and sperm have in common?

Apparently watching the NCAA tournament is the perfect way to recover from a vasectomy. Because you can sit on the couch and apply frozen peas to your boy bits. Why peas? They squish around into all the nooks and crannies. OK, that last part actually makes sense. I've used peas and corn on injured toes and ankles for exactly that reason; they wrap around whatever hurts.

Do you think I could make this up?

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Hockey Skates and Carotids Should Never Meet

Ouchie. At a game in Buffalo, Richard Zednik of the Florida Panthers took a skate to the neck. In the third period, Zednik's teammate Olli Jokinen accidentally hit him with his skate when he was upended. The Sabres' trainer led him off the ice and he was rushed to Buffalo General Hospital. Apparently he's going to be fine. The team has resumed practice, and Zednick could be playing again next season.

It's reminiscent of 1989 when Clint Malarchuk took a skate to the neck during a game against the St. Louis Blues. Again, this occurred in Buffalo. So apparently Western New York is just bad for the neck. Yeah, I know, it's a stretch.

Don't worry, this post isn't getting a picture.

Only one hockey player has ever died on the ice. Bill Masterson slammed his head onto the ice. This was basically the reason the NHL began requiring helmets.

Since we're on the subject of hockey, I would like to point out that I love the fact that Ryan Miller is in that Amp commercial. He out-smack-talks another goalie (possibly someone from the Kings?) by switching languages. If it wasn't a Sabres player, that commercial would be really stupid.



I'm OK with him being a commercial whore. He's pretty much the only good player the Sabres have this year. Which is why that Sabres-Rangers game I went to was so sad. It wasn't the loss (hello, I'm from Buffalo, I can handle sports teams losing), it was the complete hopelessness of the entire game.

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