Monday, June 30, 2008

I Hate Judgmental Video Games

Here's a good editorial about Wii Fit.

It uses BMI (crap) to determine your goals and will give you weight-loss tips even if you enter "no change" in your weight loss preferences. Plus, once it measures your BMI (again, crap) it will change your Mii's body accordingly. And again, no matter what your enter as your goal, it will select a BMI (do I have to say it again? crap) goal for you. Apparently 22 is some sort of universal crap BMI magic number or something.

I wonder if it would give mine giant knockers. I mean, if it's trying to make your Mii's body more like yours...

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Saturday, June 28, 2008

It Does Happen In Threes.

First, Tim Russert dies.

Then we lose George Carlin, one of the greatest comedians ever.

And now, we've lost the world's best and most adorable college mascot, Uga VI at age 9.

Rest in peace, badass puppy.

(I'll refrain from using terms like "the air-conditioned doghouse with a big bag of ice to lay on in the sky")



He was Georgia's "winningest" mascot.

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Friday, June 27, 2008

My Dog Is Cuter Than All Others.

Don't question the cuteness.



She likes to help me clean.

And Barney's all, "wtf, mate?"

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Express Yourself By Rendering Yourself Unable To Make Facial Expressions


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Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Alex Trebek Is STILL A D-Bag

So tonight the final category is the Heisman Trophy.

As soon as Alex revealed it, he said "and the ladies just went 'augggh!'" To which my insides went "augggh!"

Because women NEVER pay attention to sports.

Douche.

*EDIT* All three contestants got it right, including the two women (one of whom won). It was easy, name one of the two winners who share their last name with a U.S. President? Duh, all three of them said Reggie Bush. As did I. God, standing around making small talk at the end, I'd be like "So, you didn't think the girls would know sports, eh, douchebag Alex? Well, suck it."

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R.I.P. George Carlin 1937-2008

George Carlin was one of my favorite comedians. He was incredibly offensive in a good way. He took topics that on the surface seem horrifying (see "Rape Can Be Funny") and talked about them in a way that was actually very insightful (in the rape one he actually takes on victim blaming for how stupid it is).

He talked about really important things, and took obvious pleasure in getting a rise out of people. But he was also hilarious. It's not easy to make people think and piss them off while at the same time making them laugh their asses off.

After the jump I've put up some clips of his routines, including his "Seven Words" bit.















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I Need To Do Some Shopping.

First off, I am going to pay tribute to George Carlin soon. But I want to actually take some time to write something about him, because he deserves more than a quick mention.

Anyhoo, via an ad on Feministing, I have discovered Dogs 4 Democrats. I now feel I need to buy things for Zelda. Like an Obama collar (maybe after the convention)? Or how about some poop bags with Bush and Cheney's faces one them? They say "Mission Accomplished," which is as full of crap as the bags will be. Probably more so if you have a small dog with small poop.

And for cat people, there is "DemoCats" merchandise as well.

I guess I need money.

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Monday, June 23, 2008

Alex Trebek Is A D-Bag

I'm a big geek and I pretty much watch Jeopardy! every day that I can be in front of my TV at 7 PM.

My least favorite part is where the contestants introduce themselves (I don't CARE what you do for a living - I just want the geeky trivia!). Today though, one of the contestants, a man named Sven, said that when he got married both he and his wife changed their last names.

Alex Trebek couldn't seem to wrap his head around that. He asked, "so Sven ---- [I didn't catch the last name] isn't your real name?" To which he was like, "It's my real name, just not my birth name."

(women change their names all the time when they get married, but never have to have that conversation. it's expected of us.)

I didn't catch if he said why he and his wife chose to do this, I was too busy thinking that he was a badass and that Trebek's reaction was incredibly stupid. Plus I was making dinner.

If I find a video of it later, I'll post it. But the episode just ended. He won, by the way.

*Edit*: Thanks to Google, it appears his "fake" last name is Sinclair.

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Because They Have To.

A good letter in today's New York Times. Abortion providers continue to do their jobs despite harassment and injury for the simple reason that women out there need their services. It was in response to an article last week about a Kansas grand jury being (ab)used politically to convict abortion provider Dr. George Tiller. Tiller has been subject to harassment and was even shot in both arms for providing abortions.

As I tend to do whenever violence or harassment against abortion providers is mentioned, I'm going to invoke Barnett Slepian. When you Google his name the first hit is Wikipedia, the second is from www.armyofgod.com and titled "Babykiller Barnett Slepian." You know, 11 years after his family watched him bleed to death on the kitchen floor. Cuz they're, you know, pro-life.

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Sunday, June 22, 2008

I'm Back

And posting the only music video in recent history that has the potential to get me laid. haha.



It's also an obnoxiously catchy song that I might need in my iPod for 5K training.

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Saturday, June 14, 2008

Taking a Break

In case you care, I probably won't be posting much for the next week or so. I'll have friends in town and most likely won't have as much free time to post.

Before I go, I feel like I should at least mention Tim Russert's death. I didn't always agree with him, but he was good at what he did, plus, he was a fellow Buffalo native and always spoke of that with pride. That's all.

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Friday, June 13, 2008

R. Kelly Gets Off

Um, no pun intended.

R. Kelly was acquitted in his child porn case.

Given the evidence, I can't say that I'm surprised. The woman who is supposedly in the tape denied that it was her, plus there's the mole issue: R. Kelly has a large mole on his back and the man in the video does not.

One of the jurors said was positive that the man was R. Kelly but couldn't vote 'guilty' because the woman denied it was her.

Look, if he was having sex with a 13-year-old then, you know, ew. That's a problem. But the evidence in this case was weak at best, and I would say that "reasonable doubt" is an understatement.

Just because this involves possible statutory rape doesn't mean we can ignore the legal system and presume him guilty without proof.

I mean, I watch CSI. I've seen what will and won't stand up in court. Kidding.

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Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Ugh, Gag

OK, I just noticed this on CNN's Political Ticker: an incredibly deep article claiming Scarlett Johansson has a crush on Obama. Why? Because she sends him emails, he personally responds and she is impressed by that.

I can see why she'd be impressed - I can't imagine someone on the Presidential campaign trail has a ton of free time to personally answer e-mails, considering he probably receives thousands a day. I would assume most people who e-mail him get either a) nothing or b) a form response. I'm sure her name on the message is motivation for a reply - because now there will be Political Ticker articles about what a great guy he is for personally responding to her.

But - crush? Seriously? I'm finding that a little offensive, because to me it's making the assumption that because a young woman is impressed by a man's actions, she must have some kind of romantic designs on him. The womenz don't have enough emotional levels to appreciate an action without some sort of "crush."

Maybe no one agrees with me, but this particular clip really got to my gag reflex.

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John Cusack's MoveOn.Org Ad

I wuv him

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Birth Control Under John McCain

Be afraid.

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Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Money, Please

I have officially signed up for the Susan G Komen Race for the Cure. You can have the honor of donating on my behalf if you go to my personal page. Woo!

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Because I'm Kind Of Obnoxious

I've decided to sign up for a 5K. Probably the Susen G Komen Race for the Cure in September (maybe I'll be able to run 3 miles without stopping by then, the most I've managed so far is 2). And I think I want to wear a shirt that has something on it making fun of the assumption that fat people can't run. Something in really annoying faux-internet-y language...something like "OMG! Teh fattyz running!!!!11one"

It's probably a stupid idea, but I like to cause trouble. It's what I do, and I do it well.

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Saturday, June 7, 2008

Official Nomination-age

OK, technically it's not official until the convention in August, but today Clinton announced the end of her candidacy and endorsed Obama. She also asked her supporters to vote for him. I believe the official term is "called for party unity."

Or as I prefer, "end the tantrums about your favorite not winning and support the candidate that is closest to your views instead of allowing the polar opposite to get into office and destroy us all."

So let's hope we can get the same record voter turnout (or more!) in November and elect the Democratic ticket.

Hey, I even added Obama to my list of Facebook pages. And I still maintain he'd have to be stupid to pick anyone other than Clinton as his running mate. Want to talk party unity? Put the two candidates that drew out a record number of voters on the same ticket. It seems obvious to me. And I'm not the only one.

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Counter Protest "The Pill Kills" Morons

It's the anniversary of Griswold v. Connecticut, which is the case that deemed it unconstitutional for any state to outlaw birth control. According to a comment on this Feministing post there will be anti-choice asshats protesting at various clinics around the country tomorrow (as usual, Planned Parenthood will be targeted) claiming "the Pill kills." A group known as Planning is Power! will host counter-protests at as many of the clinics as possible, including PPNYC locations in Manhattan and Brooklyn. Apparently the Bronx clinic won't be open so there won't be any protests.

Directions:

The Manhattan Planned Parenthood (a.k.a. the Margaret Sanger Center) is at 26 Bleecker at the corner of Mott. The closest subway stops are the Bleecker St 6 stop and the Broadway/Lafayette B/D/F/V stop.

The Brooklyn PPNYC is at 44 Court St in Brooklyn Heights. The nearest subway stops are the 2/3/4/5/M/R to Court St/Borough Hall and A/C to High St. The F to York St is not too far away in DUMBO (woot). The Brooklyn PPNYC is not well marked and is hard to find from the street. I think it's between Remsen and Jorlemon. There's an office supply store right next to it if that helps. I have no idea where the protesting will take place, maybe across the street in that open area outside the courthouse?

Apparently it starts at 8 AM and goes until noon. I hope I can get up early enough because I plan to walk up there and check it out.

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Creepy Abstinence Wear, Now At Low Prices

K-Mart is selling abstinence sweat pants.

Only to girls, of course. Because it doesn't matter how much screwing teenage boys are doing as long as we keep those delicate young ladies chaste and pure. So bring on the brainwashing sweatpants.

Next up, Wal-Mart sells "condoms cause cancer" thong panties. "The pill kills" camisoles? No?

Can I at least point out the irony that they chose sweatpants to promote abstinence, since they are pretty much the easiest and fasted kind of pants to remove?

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Friday, June 6, 2008

Barrage of Links About Body Image

I'm too fat and lazy to do a long post about each of these. So have some blurby goodness.

Madonna hates her thighs. Cuz, you know, being Italian and pushing 50, plus having popped out a couple of kids doesn't allow for anything but stick legs and a complete lack of body fat. Maybe she was just trying to come across as someone women could "relate to?" (I know I would otherwise relate to fake British accents and doinking your personal trainer, it was just the thighs that stopped me)

An obviously unwell woman decided to blog about all the fat people at WisCon and blur out their faces to make it OK. Apparently in her (fake) apology she blamed an eating disorder for her hate. I thought those were internal? Oh, and oopsie, one of the targeted people saw it and responded.

I'm pretty sure this is the basis of the CSI episode "Big Middle."

Talk body image with former Olympian Dominique Dawes.

There's an identity to being fat. Which sounds a lot better to me than, say, considering self-inflicted injury at age 10 because of a particularly harsh teasing incident and still being on anti-depressants/having no self-esteem 14 years later thanks to the constant barrage of insults as a child. Hypothetically.

Personal fitness scores sent home from gym class to parents? Based on BMI, which is complete crapola, no less (like the Wii Fit?). Always good to add potential fodder to the merciless bullies of elementary schools. I'm pretty certain my parents knew I was the fat kid. Not to mention the fact that these tests (based on number of sit-ups/push-ups, and mile-run times) only measure some fitness. I'd have failed that but if there'd been a swim test I'd probably have done close to the best out of everyone despite having twice as much to pull through the water.

The craze for celebrity "baby-bump watching" is stupid and offensive on many levels.

More about the problems with Wii Fit.

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The Glaring Results Of Cultural Brainwashing.

Hey guess what, if two people who supported Clinton are quoted in a article, they represent the exact sentiments of every other person who supported Clinton! That's right. Obviously because this one woman felt that the Democratic party treated the candidates unequally and the other plans to vote for McCain over Obama, that must be how we all feel!

Well, that's what this glimmering beacon of political enlightenment seems to think.

Despite the fact that, well, Clinton's campaign was treated differently than Obama's by both Democrats and the mainstream media, if we call anyone out on it we're just whining because we think she was entitled.

Never mind the fact that Clinton herself said weeks ago how stupid it would be for her supporters to vote for McCain over Obama. At some point, some exit poll somewhere said that some Clinton supporters would vote McCain (I notice we failed to mention that nearly as many Obama supporters said the same thing)! And there's one person quoted in that article! zomg it's true for everyone!!!!!11111one

Run your eyes really fast from left to right over my banner. See me roll my eyes? I'm doing it for real, too.

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Wednesday, June 4, 2008

You've Probably Been Waiting For This.

Since the general assumption has been that I'm obsessed with the Clinton campaign, both of you reading this have probably wondered what my reaction to the final tally is.

First of all, I was never obsessed. I have an opinion and a preference and I'm not afraid to say what it is. But being in the minority in a lot of areas of my life, I was sought out as the go-to Clinton supporter and subsequently seen as a bastion of all knowledge and facts relating to her campaign. But obsessed? Not so much. Opinionated and obnoxious maybe.

Secondly, I have been saying since day one that I have no particular qualms with Barack Obama. In fact, come August (once the convention is over and his nomination is official) I will probably be sporting Obama campaign swag of some sort.

Trois, John Kerry wasn't my first choice in 2004 but I still voted for him. Of course, I voted by absentee ballot in Georgia so it probably wasn't counted anyway. But that's not the point.

I am, however, going to paste here something I just posted as a comment on Feministing. Basically I wrote about what the Clinton campaign (and the whole primary circus) taught me about this country.

It showed my how horrifyingly sexist our country still is. Even people I wouldn't have thought of as in any way misogynistic made comments about Clinton being "too political" or "too aggressive" and things of the same ilk, characteristics shared by all politicians but only lambasted in females.

It showed me that a woman can be the more experienced candidate but her career is taken far less seriously than a male competitor's is.

It showed me that a smart, strong, independent, qualified woman in a position of power still terrifies the American people at large.

I learned a woman can make a brilliant and intelligent speech or kick serious ass in a debate but the next day we will only her about her hairstyle, her pantsuit or her cleavage.

I learned you are either stony and emotionless or a hysterical woman; there is no middle ground.

I learned that if your husband cheats on you and you don't leave him, you are, by default, abusive to women and a sexual harasser. However, had you left him, you would be less of a woman or at least less qualified for the presidency for being divorced (that's my own speculation but I doubt anyone would disagree here).

I learned if your daughter helps you campaign, you are "pimping her out." Because there's no way that the daughter of a smart, strong woman would grow up to also be a smart, strong woman and be able to make her own decisions about politics.

I learned that the media's collective soft-kissing of a particular candidate can secure his future long before he ACTUALLY secures his future.

I learned that a female president will automatically attract terrorists, despite the fact that several countries we are allegedly fighting against have had women in positions of power, as have friendlier nations who have yet to be blown up for it.

I learned that people automatically assume that if you happen to choose the candidate that matches your sex or race (when there's actually an option other than white male) that is the only reason you are voting for them. It's not possible that you just prefer the candidate.

I learned that it's still OK to use derogatory sexist names and slurs while using parallel racial terms would earn you a one way trip to bloody-pulp-ville. Or banned-from-the-media-ville. Etc.

Mostly I learned that since the general public is still intimidated by smart, strong women, I should stand up and be one, not shut my mouth, not be a good little girl, and not take any of this sexist BS laying down, because if we just roll over and let it happen nothing will never change.

(I also decided that if Obama has any political savvy in him he'll pick Clinton for his veep, they would be completely unstoppable as a joint ticket in my opinion)

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Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Wedding Shows Are Ridiculous

I hate weddings. Seriously. I don't have any strong desire to get married, but if I ever do walk that plank I'm thinking city hall or Vegas (seriously, why would you want to go to a church and/or blow 50 grand on one stupid day when you can have an ordained alien or Elvis marry you?). I hate wedding shows even more than I hate weddings...unless the shows come with an open bar, too.

Anyhoo, this video is awesome:




Edit: Random thought - someone should open a Transformers-themed chapel in Vegas. I mean, seriously, there would be nothing cooler than having Optimus Prime perform your wedding. If they did that I'd grab the next guy that passed me on the street and marry him. Or maybe it could be 80s-toy themed in general. That way you could choose, would you like to be married by Optimus, She-Ra, or Funshine Bear?

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